


a new beginning (let's call it hope)

by Brook



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bonding, F/M, Hope, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-04-10
Packaged: 2018-10-17 09:36:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10591311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brook/pseuds/Brook
Summary: Abby is feeling ill, but she's also stubborn as hell so she's not letting it stop her. That is until she has to run out of an official dinner, forcing her to deal with it. But when the king's healer gives her some unexpected news the list of things she has to deal with becomes that much longer, and she has to talk to Marcus and Clarke. Bonding ensues.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Not completely happy with this work yet, but I figured I'd post it anyway. There are parts and sentences I'm proud of and there are ones I'm still very dubious about, so I'd really appreciate some feedback. Have fun reading!

Abby rinses her mouth with water and uses the sleeve of her jacket to wipe her face. This is the fifth meal she’s thrown up in three days and it’s not getting any better. At this rate she might as well stop eating all together and safe the rations for someone who can actually keep food down. 

Slowly she gets up from the ground and it takes her a minute to get her bearings. Then she walks out of her office purposefully, trying to focus on the day ahead and the patients she’ll be seeing. 

To her slight annoyance Jackson is already there when she enters medical and it’s obvious by the look of concern on his face that he’s heard everything. 

“Are you okay?” He asks, and she groans internally. “I’m fine Jackson, I just caught some sort of bug, it’ll be out of my system in a couple of days”. 

So far she’s been able to keep it quiet that she hasn’t been feeling well. Their people would panic, and worry unnecessarily. Not to mention Marcus’d go into overdrive trying to care for her and drive himself into the ground in the process. 

“Are you sure?” Jackson continues, “maybe you should let Kane go to Polis by himself, get some rest…” He trails off, as if knowing exactly how she's going to respond.

It's not that she doesn't appreciate his concern, she does, but it's too important to miss. They're going on a diplomatic mission to Polis to confer with Roan and the leaders of the other clans. As co - chancellor's both their presences are required. 

Besides, she's not gonna miss an opportunity to see Clarke. 

“I have to go Jackson, they're expecting both of us. And anyway, it's not like we're going into battle, it's just deliberations”. Abby knows well enough that there's no guarantee that they won't run into trouble, but she doesn't bother adding this out loud.   
Fortunately he let’s it go, apparently well aware that he’s not gonna change her mind anyway, and they work in silence the rest of the morning. 

-

A few hours later Abby’s on her way to Polis with the delegation, Marcus a few paces behind her. They’ve been walking the entire afternoon already but they’ve got about an hour left to go before they reach the city. 

The sun is beating down on them unforgivingly. It’s not even at it’s highest point yet it’s still extremely hot. Under normal circumstances Abby might have revelled in it, but right now it’s getting to her. 

She’s exhausted and her head is pounding. The world feels like it’s tilting on its axis, spinning uncontrollably. 

Abby silently berates herself for letting it affect her this much, being weak, and she’s just about to reach for her water flask when she feels herself falling, the world going black before she even reaches the ground… 

Marcus sees her go down and is at her side in an instant, and he’s not the only one. One of the guards has noticed too, and so has Octavia, who jumps of her horse effortlessly and joins him. 

“Abby!” He says panic stricken, as he feels her neck for a pulse. It’s there and he’s no doctor but as far as he can tell it’s reasonably strong, so he sighs in relief. 

The guard that has been standing over them crouches down and Marcus looks up. “What’s going on sir” She asks, and he realises it’s Adams. “I’m not sure, she just went down” He replies, to his own frustration, and a look of uncertainty crosses Adams’ face. 

“What is it? Spit it out” He says, rather harsher than he means to, but then, he always gets more intense when Abby is involved. 

The guard looks uncomfortable but opens her mouth none the less, “I spoke to Jackson before we left sir. He told me she was sick this morning, asked me to keep an eye on her”. 

Anger flares up in Marcus’ chest and he has to remind himself that he’s supposed to keep his cool. “Why didn’t you mention this earlier?” He grits out, and Octavia rests a hand on his arm as a warning. He appreciates the contact and let’s it ground him. 

“He wasn’t even supposed to tell me sir, Chancellor Griffin made him promise, but he didn’t wanna risk sending her out without anyone knowing so he informed me”. 

And isn’t that just like Abby. Always ready to sacrifice her well being for the greater good. If she weren’t unconscious right now he’d be so mad at her it’d probably end in a screaming match. As it is though, he’s still too worried. 

Marcus sighs and closes his eyes momentarily. “Of course she did” He concedes, and he can see the relief on Adams’ face at his docile reaction. He can’t really blame her or Jackson, Abby’s still co - chancellor after all, and she’d known very well that she’d be obeyed. 

When he looks down at Abby again his heart skips a beat. Her eyes are open and she looking around in confusion. “Hey” He whispers and smiles as he strokes a thumb over her cheek, “welcome back”. 

“Marcus? What happened?” She asks and tries to sit up. He stops her by gently holding her shoulders down. “careful, I think you fainted, you may have hurt yourself” He says, then adding, “Why didn’t you tell me you’re sick?”. 

There’s so much affection in his voice that it overwhelms her and she brings a hand to his, gripping it tight. “I didn’t want you to worry. It’s just a bug and I didn’t wanna waste time arguing about whether or not I should go”. 

“You made me worry anyway” He admits and he diverts his eyes away from hers. “I’m sorry Marcus” She says and she has the decency to actually sound guilty, “but I promise I’m okay. Trust me, I’m a doctor”. 

He can’t help but laugh at that and he gently helps her sit up. 

Octavia hands her a flask, “Here, have some water”, and is still scrutinizing her. Abby accepts the flask gratefully and takes a few careful sips, then smiles. “Honestly I’m fine, it was mostly the heat that got to me. We’re almost there, we should get moving again”. 

It’s evident by the look on his face that Marcus is about to protest but Octavia intervenes. “Fine” She says, “But you’re taking my horse”, and then, before Abby can decline, “It’s either that or Kane carries you, your choice”. 

The choice isn’t hard, not while they’re surrounded by other people at least, and Abby lets Octavia help her on Helios, to ride out the rest of the way. 

-

They make it to Polis in good time. Abby hasn’t really been paying attention, choosing instead to focus on her breathing and staying on the horse. It’s proving to be more difficult than she’d like, but at least she doesn’t have to walk anymore. 

Once they’re in the tower they get a few minutes to freshen up before they’re led into the hall where they’ll be having dinner with the king. Abby uses the time to get her bearings and drink some water, trying to get her nausea under control. 

Unfortunately it doesn’t work and as soon as they’re seated at the table her queasiness gets even worse. There are all sorts of dishes on the table, and while it normally would’ve been a treat to have so many options to chose from, right now it’s just making her stomach churn. 

Roan walks in with Clarke in tow, who’d come to Polis earlier that week attend a meeting, and they take their seats at the table. Roan at the head with Marcus and Indra on either side, and Clarke next to Indra, across from Abby. 

Mother and daughter give each other a small smile while Roan welcomes all his guests and open the dinner. 

Then the time comes for them to load their plates and Abby looks around uncertainly. There isn’t a lot there she recognizes, except for the potatoes, and most of the dishes are stews. She decides to stick to the potatoes and some weird looking vegetables, hoping that they’ll be neutral enough for her to keep down. 

As soon as she takes a bite she realises it’s a mistake and she clasps her hand in front of her mouth as she springs from her chair. Clarke gives her a curious look but Abby is too busy getting out of there to respond. She hurries out the door a leaves a stunned silence behind.

Marcus head fills with worry and he wants to run after her, but he’s the only remaining ambassador still at the table and his priority right now needs to be on apologizing to Roan. It’s what Abby would want. 

So he turns to the king instead. “My apologies Roan, she’s been feeling ill all day but insisted she come anyway,”He says, adding “I hope you can forgive her rude departure”. 

The king smiles. “She’s strong for wanting to carry out her responsibility despite her condition, there’s no need of forgiveness, she has earned my respect. I shall send someone to check on her”. 

He beckons one of his guards over and starts talking in rapid Trigedasleng, “  
The guard nods and swiftly walks out the door. 

“Allana is one of our finest healers”, Roan says, turning his attention back to Marcus, “She’ll be able to help with Abby’s ailments, it’ll be alright”. 

Marcus nods. He’s still worried and from the looks of it so is Clarke, but soothing their worries is gonna have to wait till after dinner.

-

When she’s finally done vomiting, or retching really, since there was nothing in her stomach to be expelled, Abby sits up and looks around to find a cup of water. 

She’s surprised when one is handed to her by a guard she recognizes from earlier. The man must’ve slipped in while she was too busy throwing up to notice. A slight flush of embarrassment creeps over her but she ignores it. 

“Thank you” She says as she takes the water from him gratefully, rinsing her mouth with the cool liquid. 

As she moves to stand he puts a hand under her elbow to steady her, the contact so naturally efficient that she accepts the help without hesitation. 

“King Roan has asked me to take you to his healer” the man says, voice a low rumble, “she’s the best we have and she’ll help you however she can”. Abby nods. She’d protest, but after running out on dinner she’s not about to insult Roan even more by refusing his help. 

So she lets him lead her out into the corridor and through the tower, until he stops in front of a door that’s embellished with some sort of symbol. Her guide nocks and the door opens to show a gentle looking woman, considering she’s probably Azgeda. 

The two grounders exchange a few sentences in rapid Trigedasleng and then Abby is ushered inside, the door closing behind her before she can even thank her guard. 

“Ilya explained to me your situation. I am Allana, the king’s healer, and he’s instructed me to help you” the other woman says, “how long have you been feeling ill?”. 

Abby considers this. The nausea had only started a couple of days ago but now that she thought about it she hadn’t been feeling well for a while. “About two weeks ago I think, though the vomiting only started three days ago”. 

There’s a cupboard nearby and Allana starts rummaging through it, taking out a tiny vial and handing it to Abby. “One drop of this in a cup of warm water in the morning” She instructs, “once more during the day if necessary but no more than that. It’ll help with the nausea”. Nodding, Abby takes the vial. 

“Do you know what caused you to get sick” Allana asked, and Abby shrugges, “Probably just something that’s going around, it’ll work itself out. Not throwing up anymore should help me gain some strength and then it should be fine”. 

Allana’s eyebrows quirk up. “Are you certain it isn’t something else?” She inquires. At Abby’s confused look she goes on to explain. “Could you perhaps be with child?”. 

The vial in Abby’s hands nearly drops to the floor. “No” She says immediately, not letting herself think about it. Panic is taking over her heart and she suddenly feels the overwhelming urge to get out of there. 

“Thanks for the tonic” She says as she makes her way to the door, “but I should really get some rest. I’ll let you know if I need anything else”. And with that she’s out the door and practically sprinting back to her bedroom. 

Abby doesn’t stop until she’s inside, the door firmly closed behind her. Then she promptly slides to the floor with her back against the wall, arms wrapped around her knees. 

Could what Allana had said be true? She hadn’t even considered it an option. She’s forty two and after having Clarke she’s always had an implant. But now that she’s thinking about it she can’t remember when it was renewed. It should’ve been right around Clarke’s eighteenth birthday but no, they were on the ground by then. 

Realisation hits her like a meteor. She’s been having unprotected sex all this time. 

She mentally berates herself. She’s a doctor for god's sake, she should’ve known better, should’ve kept up with her own medical checkups. But she’s been so busy with everything she completely forgot. 

Quickly standing up Abby reaches for the door. She has to be sure. Normally she’d wait till she can do her own test back at camp but she can’t face Marcus like this, nor can she tell him until she’s certain. Dinner will probably last a while longer, so she makes her way out the door and into the corridor. 

It takes a while before she finds Allana’s quarters again and by the time she does her heart is racing. She knocks on the door determinedly before she can change her mind. 

Allana smiles when she opens the door and beckons her in, as if she’d been expecting Abby to return all along. 

“If I were…” She starts, unable to say the actual words, “Is there a way we could find out?”. 

-

Marcus makes his way out the door as soon as Roan excuses them, Clarke right on his heel. “What’s going on with my mom?” She asks, concern lacing her voice. 

He doesn’t slow down, just glances at her sideways. “I don’t know” He replies earnestly, “she fainted on our way over here and Adams said she was throwing up this morning”. 

“Your mom is convinced it’s just some sort of bug, but maybe the healer can help to get her to take it seriously or at least slow down” Marcus adds, and he can’t quite keep all the frustration out of his voice. 

Clarke doesn’t say anything, just follows him through the hallways to the room he shares with Abby. She knows her mom well enough to realise that Marcus’ frustration is justified. 

They reach the room a few minutes later. It’s the same room as last time, the official Skycru chancellors chambers. 

Abby isn’t there so she’s probably still with the healer, hopefully figuring out what’s wrong with her. Marcus gestures to the couch and pours two cups of water. He and Clarke sit down on either end of the couch to wait. 

Fortunately it isn’t long before Abby shows up. She walks in just five minutes later, a weary expression on her face. She’s not surprised to see both Marcus and Clarke there, but it does make matter more complicated. Marcus and her need to talk first and so she’ll have to lie to Clarke, which isn’t something she likes. 

Both of them look up as they hear the door close and Abby smiles at them. “Mom!” Clarke exclaims, jumping up and crossing the room in an instant, “Are you okay?”. 

“I’m fine honey,” Abby assures her daughter, “Just a stomach bug, it’ll be gone in a couple of days”. 

Clarke doesn’t look convinced but she lets it go. “Is there anything I can do?” She asks, but Abby shakes her head. “I just need to get some sleep. I’ll come see you in the morning”. Her daughter is smart enough to see the dismissal for what it is and nods. 

“Let me know if you need anything okay? I’m right down the hall” Clarke says. Abby smiles and gives her a tight hug. “I will”. 

With one last look back at Marcus Clarke moves to the door and then she’s gone, leaving them alone. 

Abby walks over to the couch and settles down on Marcus’ lap, burying her head in his neck. “hey” She whispers, as his arms arms come up around her protectively, one hand tracing the length of her spine. 

“Hey yourself” He replies, “How are you feeling?”. Abby sighs, sitting up straight. “I’m okay. Allana gave me something for my nausea”. Then she adds, “But we need to talk”. 

She wants to stay here forever, in this moment, wrapped in his warmth, but she owes Marcus this conversations, owes him his space while she gives him news that’s going to change his life. So instead she moves away and takes a seat a foot away from him. 

There’s concern on his face, and she can’t really blame him. It’s better to just tell him now, fill in the details later. It’d be cruel to let him suffer longer than is absolutely necessary. 

With a faint sigh she meets his eyes. “Marcus, I’m pregnant”. 

Three seconds tick by and it feels like an eternity. Marcus’ face flashes from incomprehension to disbelieve to hopeful so fast it makes Abby’s eyes spin. It settles on hopeful though, which makes her feel slightly more relaxed. 

“How?” Marcus asks, voice barely above a whisper. Slightly ashamed to admit her stupidity out loud Abby sighs. “My implant. It was supposed to be replaced right after we came to the ground but with everything…” she trails off. 

“I’m sorry Marcus, I’d understand if…” She starts again, but before she can finish her sentence he swoops her off the couch and cradles her against him in a tight hug. 

“Don’t. Don’t apologize, please,” He murmurs, “tell me how you’re feeling”. He doesn’t have to add that it’s not about her physical health this time and Abby gives herself a moment to really consider her answer. 

Then she moves so she can meet Marus’ eyes again. “I’ve never let myself consider this.” She says, “I always wanted more kids but on the Ark… I couldn’t let myself dwell on it. This feels like a second chance”. 

Marcus kisses her, letting his forehead rest against hers when he moves away again. “I’ve always wanted a big family” He admits, “but on the Ark I didn’t feel like that was an option. Down here things are different”. 

“All those kids back in Arkadia, Clarke,” he continues, “they feel like family, and it was enough. But now Abby, you’re giving me everything I’ve always wanted. I love you so much”. 

This time Abby initiates the kiss, and it’s a lot more passionate, lasting until they have to come up for air. Marcus’ hand makes his way to her stomach and the gesture is so sweet it brings tears to her eyes. 

“So I guess you’re okay with this” She half jokes, half asks, because part of her still needs the validation that he’s not mad. Marcus cradles her face in his hands and looks at her intently. “I’m more than okay with this. I’m happy” He says, nothing but complete honesty in his voice. 

Abby smiles and covers his hands with hers. “You need to understand the risks Marcus” she says, “pregnancy at my age is tricky, there’s a lot that can go wrong”. 

“I know” he replies, “and we’ll be prepared for that. But I have hope that everything is going to be okay”. They both smile at his use of their catchword. Then Marcus adds, “We’re going to have a baby Abby”. 

He seems so baffled by the concept that she smiles. “We are” She says. “And Clarke is going to be a big sister”. 

The thought about Clarke brings a new ball of anxiety to the pit of her stomach and she sighs. Abby has no idea how she’ll react, even if she did seem okay with her and Marcus, they haven’t really talked about it and now it’s gonna get even more complicated. 

Marcus seems to follow her train of thought and he strokes his thumb over her cheek. “I’m sure she’ll be okay with it. Clarke loves you, and she’s going to love this baby”. 

“I just don’t wanna overwhelm her” Abby says, “She’s had to deal with so much change since she came to earth, has had to accept so many things. I don’t wanna put too much on her, when she’s already had to come to term with us”. 

It’s not an unfounded concern, because despite how she’s been handling everything, her daughter is only eighteen. It’s not fair to expect her to just be okay with everything. 

Still, Marcus has a point. And even if he’s wrong it doesn’t change the fact that Abby’s going to have to tell her. “I have to talk to her. Right now. She deserves to hear it from me, before Roan or his servants tell her, because I’m pretty sure they already know”. 

Looking back on his remarks after Abby’s departure from the dinner table Marcus is pretty sure she’s right, so he nods. “Go” He says, “I’ll be here when you get back”. 

With one last kiss on his lips Abby stands and leaves. Clarke’s room is down the hall so she doesn’t have to go far. When she reaches the door she takes a deep breath and knocks. 

Clarke opens the door already in sleep clothes, a concerned look on her face. “Mom, what’s wrong?” She immediately asks, looking her over. Abby smiles reassuringly, “Nothing honey, I just need to talk to you about something”. 

Stepping aside, Clarke beckons her in, closing the door behind her mother. Abby moves to the couch and pats the seat beside her. “Come sit down honey, I have something to tell you”. 

This doesn’t do anything to lessen Clarke’s worries but she sits down anyway, looking at Abby intently. 

“I found out why I’ve been sick” She begins, “I’m pregnant”. Clarke blinks, then, “What?!” she exclaims. Abby quickly continues, “I know it’s a lot to take in, but I promise you this doesn’t change how much I love you” she reassures. 

Clarke shakes her head. “Of course not mom” she says, “that’s not… I would never think that. But how? I thought you had an implant?”. Abby sighs, “I did, but it should’ve been replaced right after we came to earth and well, we were busy”. 

“So I’m guessing Marcus…” Clarke trails off. Abby nods, “He is.He’s… Happy about it” she says. “So am I” she admits. “I know it’s a lot to take in, especially so close after learning about me and Marcus, so I understand if you need some time”. 

Clarke smiles. “Mom, I haven’t seen you this happy since dad died. I know you’re not trying to replace us, you’re just expanding our family, it’s what dad would’ve wanted”. 

“Besides,” She continues, “You and Kane work somehow. You make him a better man and he’s good for you too. You’re already parenting half the camp, it’s only fitting you get another kid”. 

Tears fill Abby’s eyes and she brings a hand to Clarke’s cheek. “What did I do to deserve you?” She says, smiling. Clarke answers her smile with one of her own and leans into the contact. “You’re a good mom. I don’t think I’ve ever said that but you are”. 

“This baby is gonna be so lucky. She’s going to be spoiled by all her surrogate aunts and uncles, and I won’t let anything bad happen to her, our first earth baby”. 

Abby hugs Clarke tightly for a moment and then moves back again, a slightly stunned look on her face. “Our first earth baby” She echoes, “I hadn’t even thought about that”. 

Clarke’s laughter takes her by surprise, in a good way. It’s been too long since she’s heard her daughter laugh. “Better get used to it” Clarke says, “you’re going to get a lot of attention”.

“I don’t mind, as long as I’ve got you and Marcus I can handle anything” Abby says, earnestly. Clarke smiles, “You have us. I’m pretty sure Kane won’t leave your side again until you’ve given birth, maybe not even then”. 

“ You’re probably right about that” Abby admits, “but I can’t really get myself to mind. A lot has changed”. 

“Yeah it has. But I think this is going to be good, she’s going to represent a new beginning”. 

Hope, Abby immediately thinks. “So you think it’s a girl huh?” She asks teasingly. Clarke shrugs, “I’ve always wanted a baby sister, so for now I’m going to think of her as a her”. 

“Okay” Abby says, a smile on her lips, “A girl she is”. Then she can’t help but let a yawn escape, and Clarke gives her a look. “You should go to bed” She says, “I’ll come see you in the morning”. 

Abby nods. “Okay. You get some rest too” She says as she hugs Clarke again, “I love you honey. Thank you for everything”. Clarke smiles and tightens her grip on her mother. “Anytime. I love you too”. 

With one last kiss on her daughter’s cheek Abby moves away and walks to the door. “Good night sweetheart, I’ll see you in the morning”. 

Clarke nods and smiles, “good night mom. Tell Kane congratulations from me”. “Will do” Abby says, and with that, she’s out the door.

**Author's Note:**

> I'd planned on writing another scene where Abby tells Marcus how CLarke reacted but I thought it might be too much and also dialogue is not my strong suit so I figured this was a good place to end it.   
> Hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
